My hobby is sleeping since primary school. But during the days without him, i hate sleeping. That is the time i think of him the most and i will start to miss him or even dream about him. I dream about how he treat me so bad and i cry. Until when only i can totally let go of him? I don't want to sleep, unless i'm very very tired. Scare to dream about him anymore. Don't wish to be hurt again in dream.

I always tell myself to forgive him. But when i think about how he treat me (not that he treat me bad), i cant convince myself to forgive him and treat him as friend. I suddenly query about his love to me since the beginning. I told myself not to think so much, but sometimes i just cant control it. Yoke Kuan!!! Faster wake up!!! Faster recover!!!! Don't think of someone who don't love you anymore!

This few days i will suddenly feel like i become lonely, nobody love me and care me already. But today i suddenly realize that the one who care and love me much is not him, is my parents. they have love and care me for 23 years. The one who hurt me only care and love me for 4 years. Not fully 4 years also. Excluding study and working time, the time we spend together only a few months, 24 hours per day. Maybe this is also one of the factors that he leave me i think. I think i also responsible to it. Just for time being, i really cant treat him as friend. Not because of he leave me, but the way he settle a problem. Or is it his good personality that cause this to happen?

上天会眷顾被伤害的人。
优点也会成为某方面的缺点，缺点也会成为某方面的优点。